Tether Yourself: When the Rope Drops

Laughter illuminated my friend’s brown eyes. Those of us around her couldn’t help but giggle, too, as she recounted the story of her almost-left-the-nest child calling her for directions on some home maintenance while she’d been out of town. She is a master storyteller, so it caught me off guard when her laughing stopped abruptly. She looked us all straight in the eye and said, “Girls, your babies will be off on their own before you know it. Make sure they’re ready.”

In certain moments I almost choke, completely caught up in this thought. 

Make sure they are ready.

I subscribe to the Parent Cue app.  It includes a constant countdown to my growing-too-fast boy’s 18^th birthday.  After that, I’ll have about 16 weeks before he’ll most likely leave for college.  “284 weeks until he moves on… don’t miss it.”

My Beloved and I will blink and high school parenting will be upon us. 

In lightspeed, my mind returns to Rachel’s quote, “Tether yourself to real people, real conversations and real scenery.  Tether yourself to furry animals, interesting books, good music, the great outdoors.  Tether yourself to spatulas, hammers, cameras, paintbrushes, and yoga mats.” – Rachel Macy Stafford, Hands Free Mama **click for link**

We work toward tethering ourselves to real experiences and to celebrating our families and those we love.  But, I’m still left holding this question:  What if I drop the rope? 

What if we drop the rope?

Quite simply, let’s commit to pick it back up.  We don’t have to wait until morning, or Monday or even the New Year.  Let’s choose now – in this minute – to return to the work of tethering. 

When our screen time doubles in a week, let’s recommit and set our devices out of arms reach again.  Let’s look up and begin another conversation about eye to eye and face to face interactions, then move forward. 

When we snap answers to questions or quietly seethe at frustrating choices, let’s consciously choose to refocus on grace.  Let’s not stay in the dark corners of bitterness. 

When we take ourselves too seriously, let’s make room for fun and merriment.  Let’s play games, be social and find ways to laugh. 

Making a life

In her weekly podcast, “The Next Right Thing”, Emily P Freeman begins each episode reminding us that each decision isn’t as much about the actual making of the decision as it is about making a life. (paraphrased)

The same is true for staying tethered.  Morning greeting by morning greeting, car ride conversation by car ride conversation and dinner together by dinner together, we are making a life with our kids.  When we fail, and we will, don’t give up.  Pick the rope up again.  Tether.

And, when our hands get tired of tying and blistered from holding on too tight, when the rope drops, let’s commit to not just our own rope, but each other’s as well.  Sweet friend, if you don’t have the strength I’ll hand your rope to you – with a smile and a hug.  I’ll hold the rope a while so you can rest. 

Will you do the same when I drop mine?

Hugs and blessings, Bethany