It’s fine, just be intentional

“Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow.  God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” –

Matthew 6:34 – Message Translation

“Don’t worry,” the Bible tells us in the verse above.  “Don’t worry. Be happy,” the song reminds us. Oh! How I wish worry were as easy to turn off as my bedside lamp! But the truth is – worry comes in all sorts of forms, doesn’t it? 

Wake you up in the night with a premonition of something wrong kind of worry.
She’s climbing too high on the playground equipment kind of worry.
Making friends at his new school kind of worry.
Am I doing enough to make summer count kind of worry. 

Finding this picture on the 8^th day of summer sent me down a worry wormhole.  It wasn’t for his safety or his health or his friendships or his choices.  It was much more swirling than that…

“As of this summer, two-thirds of our summers with her are gone,” said a friend on Sunday.  “I look at what all we have going and it’s like summer is already gone,” another agreed. 

Their words echoed exactly how I felt these first few schools-out days. How will I make it count?  How do I simultaneously hold the still, quiet restorative peace of summer in balance with a growing boy who wants to do sports camps, mission trips, and time away with friends? 

Friends, 12 days into summer break and I think we can all agree on this nugget of truth: Time is crazy.  It creeps moment to moment, but flies by when we blink.  It tempts us with slow, lazy days, but then fills quickly with camps and appointments and trips and visitors.  It tells us we will have more later, but really… we have less.  I worry because it feels like it’s going too fast and I wonder if I’m doing enough.   

I’m drawn to those Pinterest posts that give something to do each day (Make it Monday, Take a trip Tuesday, etc).  And I absolutely, every single time, fall into the thinking trap of “but we only have 6 summers left”!  To which the more rational parent replies, “but when he leaves for college it’s not like we will never see him again”.  To which I argue, “but it will all be different!”  Without question, I want William to remember summer as a special and memorable time.  I want him to collect experiences (that are not in front of a video game screen), to grow in every way – physically, mentally and especially spiritually.   

On the opposite side of that feeling, I’m drawn to white margins, to melting into quiet days.  There are so few other times during the year, so few seasons in life, that we can do this little for days in a row.

My color coordinated calendar didn’t help my swirling heart.  A quiet walk didn’t relax my furrowed brow. Lamenting with friends didn’t stop my spinning mind.  But, this quote from ParentCue eased me to a pause,

“When you spend both interactive and intentional time with your kids, you increase your influence with them.”

ParentCue

I read those words, and soaked this in… “It’s fine, just be intentional.”

It’s fine, just be intentional. – Long days away from home? Maybe your intentional looks like saying yes to a late-night movie with snuggles and s’mores?

It’s fine, just be intentional. – All the people in your family headed different directions?  Maybe your intentional looks like a family group hug before you all walk out the door and a texted meme mid-day to let them know you are thinking of them?

It’s fine, just be intentional. – Already checked off 10 things from your summer bucket list? Maybe your intentional looks like a slow morning of laughing together at old cartoons?

It’s fine, just be intentional. – Got busy on a project and realized your tween has played four straight hours of video games? Maybe your intentional looks like forced family fun of a board game you always say no to because it takes too long to finish? 

It’s fine, just be intentional. – A tense conversation about the need for household chores?  Maybe your intentional looks like fixing their favorite dinner and silencing the TVs and phones while you eat side by side?

It’s fine, just be intentional.  Pick one way each day to be intentional in building relationships with the people you love.

Each of us, in whatever place we may be, can choose to intentionally interact with our people. My churning thoughts, which when I name them are really called worry, begin to subside.  Time IS fleeting, but I can intentionally choose to interact in ways that build relationship in each place or space. 

“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Matthew 6:33-34 (NIV)

What does intentional mean to you in this stage of your life? What is the one way you’ll choose to be intentional in your relationships today?