A Letter to About-to-be-42-Me

Dear Actual-About-to-be-42-Me,

You’ve been through some stuff and you’ve got some big things to share.  You’re an adult-adult now. You’ve been able to drive way longer than you lived before you could drive.  You’ve been able to vote longer than you couldn’t.  You’ve even been able to enjoy an adult beverage for 21 years.  That means your ability to consume alcohol can now consume alcohol.  That frontal lobe that was fully formed when you were 25 can drive a car and is preparing for its senior year in high school.  Listen, you are such an adult that the milestones to make you an adult are almost all adults! HA!

Do you remember way back in your early twenties striving to grow as a professional?  One evening as you sat in a room of professional women, you looked around and saw smiling, competent, put-together adults.  You thought, “These women are REAL grown-ups.  They have kids and houses and professional experience. They have it TOGETHER. They wear heels and cardigans and know how to walk into a room gracefully.  Listen to them.  Learn from them.” Well, friend, here you are.  You are now a “them!”  (Not that you have it completely together, because newsflash: they didn’t either.)  You learned from them and so many others!

Even though you’re a beginner at some things now – like sharing your writing and parenting a tween – you’re bringing all of these other experiences, learning, love, loss, successes and failures to this table.  It is the time in life when you and your friends have encouragement and support to give.  Give it lavishly!

Do you remember Sophie Hudson’s book, Giddy Up, Eunice?  How in Chapter 6 she spoke so directly about building relationships across generations?  She offered five (hilariously written) ways to build relationships: 1. Shared Interests 2. Genuine Friendship (when you feel the “click” with someone) 3. Regular, low-pressure contact (make plans!) 4. Fun and laughter 5. Extravagant Grace (“God’s grace is lavish and we get to share it with each other”). And then, just a few pages later she reminds you that you don’t have to have a degree to minister to each other!  “We can sit around and wait to finally feel ‘ready’ or ‘qualified’ to be that older, wiser voice in a young woman’s life, or we can open the Bible and open our hearts and SHOW UP FOR SOMEBODY.”  Since you are now a “them” it’s imperative that YOU make the first move to reach out.  Do the inviting!

Self, there is something that I’ve watched you do for years, you’ve collected Scripture in your heart and mind (and in notebooks!).  The Words have kept your heart from pounding out of your chest and calmed your fears.  They have been words of praise and thanksgiving and reminded you of God’s love and His love for others.  My friend, I’ve compiled some here. The ones I’ve heard you repeat countless times.  Share them with others in the hopes the Word will calm their hearts as it has yours.

When your heart is anxious and trouble looms…

When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, LORD, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.

Psalm 94:18-19

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus… whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent and praiseworthy – think about such things.

Philippians 4:6-8

When you are tired and don’t know where to turn…

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame and sat down at the right hand of God.

Hebrews 12:2

Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Romans 12:2

But the Lord said to her, ‘Martha, dear friend, you are so upset over all the details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about – and I won’t take it away from her!’

Luke 10:41-42

When you don’t know exactly who you are or where you fit…

But because of His great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive in Christ, even when we were dead in our transgressions – it is by grace we are saved… (10) For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Ephesians 2:4-5, 10

… And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with God.

Micah 6:8

And in Him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit.

Ephesians 2:22

When you’ve stumbled and are being helped to your feet…

But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.

Psalm 3:3

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Psalm 51:10

Forget the former things; do not dwell in the past.  See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.

Isaiah 43:18-19

When you need to look outward instead of being in your own head…

Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds…

Hebrews 10:24

But you, [woman] of God, flee from this and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness.  Fight the good fight of faith.

1 Timothy 6:11

…Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now… holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts… be thankful… And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

Colossians 3:1-2, 7-17

When you celebrate our Hope, our Help, our Salvation…

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Even though… and though… even if… yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will be joyful in the God of my Salvation.  The Lord God is my strength…

Habakkuk 3:17-19

I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds.  I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing the praises of your name, O Most High.

Psalm 9:1-2

It is with love I embrace the learning and growth of your past.  It is with hope and faith I look toward your future.  You’ve got some good stuff going on and some good thoughts swirling around in your mind.  Don’t talk yourself out of saying them aloud.  Happy birthday and keep the faith! – Love, Your Heart

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Sweet Friends, Almost all of you are adult-adults like me.  I want to challenge you to open yourselves up to building some new relationships.  Choose people over your to do lists or your timelines or your stress.  It will be good for them – and good for you, too! Do the inviting, give encouragement lavishly, share your heart!

For my Wednesday email friends, I sent you a little gift in your email.  All the verses above – and 20 more that have spoken to my heart – in a printable .pdf for you.  I love to make and have little cards like this.  I stick them all over – in my Bible to mark the spot, taped on my car console, inside my toothbrush drawer…  Enjoy, my friends!

If you aren’t already a Wednesday email friend and would like this printable, subscribe in the form on this page, confirm your subscription in your email, and the printable will magically appear in your inbox.   🙂

Hugs and love – Bethany